I don’t like to think of myself as a busybody. I have my own life with its own set of dramas and concerns. I have learned in the past six years, however, that your life is never quite your own if you live in an apartment.
It’s not intentional. Most apartments in the price range of an early to mid-20 something, especially if you’re still wallowing in the dreaded world of roommates, have thin walls and snake-like ventilation systems that act more like a rudimentary intercom.
I’ve heard break-ups and make-ups. I’ve heard wives lie to their husbands about cheating, when their moaning hours earlier while their hubby was at work told a completely different story. I’ve heard sweet marriage proposals, fights between siblings, and people swearing revenge against their tampon-thieving roommate.
It reminds me of that Will & Grace episode where their lives practically stop due to the drama from their downstairs neighbors. They miss work and plan their lives around the drama coming from their floor vent. Infidelity, love, heartache, etc… they were hooked.
While I’ve never gone to such extremes, I’ve found myself a few times brushing my teeth a little longer than usual… meaning I would sit there on the toilet, mouth full of toothpaste, with my toothbrush dangling out, listening in on someone else’s business. I’ve proclaimed “Oh no he didn’t!” while leaning against the shower wall, soaking wet, because I could hear better with the water off.
I’m not proud of this, especially since I can barely have a phone conversation in public without feeling worried that someone was listening in. Sometimes I can’t help it. I turn into that batty old cat lady who lives down the hall. She glares at me. A lot. Seeing as I’m turning into her, with my eavesdropping tendencies, who knows what she knows about me.
It can be entertaining, though. Since you can’t hear everything, you can make up stories. Fill in the blanks with your own imaginative options. “Maybe you wouldn’t be so mad at him if you knew he has only been distant because he’s a spy, and it’s hard to deal with the pressure of saving the world, and having to keep secrets from your wife!”
I guess everyone has their secret habits when no one is looking. Mine are not so secret anymore.
10 Comments
June 9, 2008 at 4:50 pm
Ha! Oh man, I often find other people’s lives more exciting than my own. Cannot say I blame you.
June 9, 2008 at 5:47 pm
Great post!
It is hard not to play voyeur when it’s all right there in front of you.
June 9, 2008 at 5:53 pm
@Lemmonex: I can’t help it sometimes, even though I feel like a hypocrite. Although I’m sure I’m endlessly entertaining as I work from home and talk to the dog all the time.
@Princess Pointful: Thanks!
And you’re totally right. It is tough.
June 9, 2008 at 6:53 pm
I so listen in. I can’t help it. I don’t want to help it. I’m fascinated by the secret lives of people. I guess that’s why I read blogs.
I loved that episode of W & G.
June 9, 2008 at 8:36 pm
Uhm…Liz, remember when I said I had no problem with you having my address?
Never mind….
June 10, 2008 at 5:49 am
You should really be “planting” stuff. Pick up the phone and say things in such a way that you’re sure your roommates can hear you.
“No I’m sure, the blood test was positive. I hope nobody eats any of my food in the fridge.”
“I don’t know how long I can stay here. He/she just smells so BAD.”
“I’ve been hiding it in my room for a week and nobody has noticed. Can you BELIEVE it?”
“If the cops ever trace it back to me, there’ll be a 2:00 AM raid here, I just KNOW it.”
Be creative! Have fun!
June 10, 2008 at 6:54 am
I’d feel bad for anyone listening to our conversations. We basically sit around crunching on food while re-enacting the “Your powers combined…” sequence from Captain Planet.
June 10, 2008 at 11:58 am
Pretty sure this is the exact reason that I’m so addicted to blogs. There is just something mesmerizing about the life of someone you don’t know well (or do).
June 10, 2008 at 2:47 pm
I’m just cracking up at the image of you leaning against your shower wall, straining to hear the good bits of the conversation. Hilarious!
June 10, 2008 at 11:44 pm
@Herb: But, but… it’s meant to be!
@Gilahi: Ooo, good idea! Thank you!
@Ben: That… is the coolest thing ever.
@Playful Professional: It’s so true. I think deep down we’re all voyeurs just waiting to judge.
@Wickedly Scarlett: :X Yea, I look like a nerd.
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